Sigh with me…

It’s another Friday night and yes, I’m at home.  Alone.

This sucks.

Another fun filled evening of WoW’ing when what I really want to do is go out.

Well, at least the balcony door is open, it’s 75 degrees outside and well, at least I can look at it this way, by being home on another Friday night alone, at least I’m not running the risk of spending money, being killed by a drunk driver or a whole list of negative things that could possibly happen…

Did I mention this sucks?

Yeaaaaah.

Well, I figure it like this, besides avoiding drunk drivers and the whatall, whether it be positive and negative, it’s also a great time to take in another movie.

Say it with me…

“Life is like a movie.  We may not like how the story goes, we might not even like the ending, but everything always turns out in the end.”

So, in that spirit, I took in another film for the evening.  Thanks to iTunes, I rented Prince of Persia.

Since when do people from Persia sound like they’re from Britain, all the while doing bad impersonations of Johnny Depp’s Cap’n Jack Sparrow?  Yeah.  Well, even taking that into account with lots of tongue-in-cheek, and being as that I never actually played the video game “Prince of Persia”, I thought it might be a fun little jaunt.

First out of the gate, I have to get this out…Jake Gyllenhall.  I have had the hardest time shaking his impression on me from his role in Brokeback Mountain.  I just couldn’t let it go.  To me, every time I saw him in magazines or in a movie, I am ashamed to admit it, but my gaydar went off.  I couldn’t shake the overwhelming feeling he was gay.  Now remember, I have no issue with folks in the GLBT community.  I’ve got tons of gay friends that I love very much, but every time I look at Jake Gyllenhall, I can’t disassociate him from being gay, there’s just something about him that to me just doesn’t seem like he’s straight.  To be honest, it’s what kept me out of the theater and away from seeing Prince of Persia until now, I didn’t think he could be butch enough to pull off a video game hero.  But, I have to say, the long hair and the scruffy beard and all the other whathaveyou in the film, it made me realize he is a cutie you can’t ignore, I don’t care if you’re gay, straight, blue, green or aquamarine.

So, getting the main eye candy out of the way, we get into the guts of Prince of Persia.  Right off the bat who do we see?  Ben Kingsley in eyeliner.  You know, he won an Oscar for Ghandi, but really, every film other than Ghandi I’ve seen him in has just been ones that have left me looking at him and going “blech, he’s a bad guy.”  You knew it going in that Ben Kingsley had to be the bad guy, there was no one else with enough star power in the cast to really pull off a villain.

Then, out of the blue, who do we see?  Alfred Molina.  Now, funny occurrence, this is the third film in less than 48 hours I’ve seen him in.  First, I’m flipping channels and I see him opposite Selma Hayek in “Frida”, the biopic of Mexican artist Frida Khalo.  One word for poor Frida.  Wax.  Oy veh, no one should go through life with a unibrow, I don’t care who you are.  Next after Frida and her unibrow, I flip channels and spot Molina again, this time as Doc Ock in “Spider Man 2”.  Now, in Prince of Persia we see him as the Cap’n Jack wannabe running an ostrich racing racket and making political jokes.  I’m sorry but Alfred, you get a thumbs down for this…we’ve already seen Cap’n Jack in a nice little beaded bandana, we didn’t need to revisit him in a turban.  Cute portrayal though, he gets points for his comic relief.

Then we get onto the heroine, Gemma Arterton.  More British accent out of a supposed “Persian” girl, but she was sassy and spunky.  Liked her, but the whole little romance thing between her and Jake really didn’t hit home with me that hard.  The filmmakers took way too long to heat it up between them and well, when you finally see them kiss, by the way, just once (remember folks this film is from Disney) it just left me flat and rather indifferent.

But, going back to a previous point on Jake Gyllenhall, after seeing him do all that simulated jumping, swinging from ropes and so forth, then when you see those big blue eyes of his, it made me wonder why the hell they didn’t cast HIM as Peter Parker in the first place instead of Tobey Maguire for the role of Peter Parker in Spider Man.  I mean they do have the same look about them, but I have to say Jake needs to be scruffed up and shaggy to play the sexy hero type really well, if he’s clean-cut, I see Brokeback.  I can’t help it!  I know that it’s narrow of me to say and outright unforgivable, I’m sorry, but that’s just what I see.  Jake, for all of his hotness in Prince of Persia, he still doesn’t make the hotties list.

Overall, Prince of Persia was fun, entertaining and a great thrill ride.  While I’m sure the special effects must have been mindblowing in the theaters, I’m glad I saved $7.75 and saw it as a rental.

But, speaking of the hotties list, we need to make a new addition:

Matthew Goode.

Now if that name seems unfamiliar to you, it probably should.  He actually had a Brokeback moment of his own in the film Brideshead Revisited.  But, he also was Ozymandias in Watchmen.  The one film that was his huge selling point to me was a film not unlike the 1992 comedy Year of the Comet with Timothy Daly and Penelope Ann Miller, a film called Leap Year opposite Amy Adams.  Now, Leap Year was just horrible, but here we go again with the scruffed up romantic leading men…Matthew Goode earned my vote for the hotties list just for the scruff and the big blue eyes.  Ok yes, blue eyes and scruff is doing it for me these days, but if you look closer, it’s the nice emotional depth these actors give their characters is what melts my butter.

So another Friday night alone…not bad, not great either, I got in a movie, a blog post and another addition to the hotties list.

Best thing about a Friday night home alone?  At least I had popcorn.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *